Your comment post should be at least 260 words this week due Thursday by 11:59 pm (worth 70 points) and you will be responsible for responding (respectfully) to one of your classmates in at least a one paragraph reply entries by Sunday at 11:59 pm (worth 30 points).
Should Parents Bribe Their Children?
Sometimes children don’t naturally do what their parents want them to do. They play video games instead of reading books. They don’t clean up their toys after they’re finished playing. They make too much noise or don’t eat their vegetables. As they get older, they might not do their homework, study for tests or clean their room. What’s a thoughtful parent to do?
Should parents bribe their children to do what’s right — with cash, extra screen time or other extrinsic rewards?
In “The Right Way to Bribe Your Kids to Read,” KJ Dell’Antonia writes about trying to find the best way to motivate children:
My children need to read this summer. They’re in the middle of a long vacation from school, and I want them to enjoy it — but I also want them to be able to pick up their education where they left off when school starts again in the fall.
Kids who read over the summer lose fewer skills than kids who don’t. This is especially important for children from low-income families and those with language problems, like my younger daughter. When reading is difficult, so is almost everything else. As new readers move from decoding text to fluency, every subject from math to history becomes more accessible, but practice is the only way to get there.
My kids (15, 12, 10 and 10) have an enviable amount of time to read, and plenty of books to choose from. Yet it’s already clear that beyond a late August dash to fulfill their assignments, very few pages are likely to be turned unless I do something. But what?
The answer many parents fall back on is bribery.
Students: Read the entire article, then tell us:
— Should parents bribe their children with money, treats or toys? Are bribes an effective way to get children to do what parents want them to do, such as read more books, eat healthier food or be better behaved? Can they be a way to jump-start or encourage a certain behavior that eventually becomes a habit?
— Or are bribes counterproductive in the long run? Do they end up teaching the wrong lessons? Will children become accustomed to doing the desired behavior (reading, eating healthy, et cetera) only when they expect to receive a reward? For example, will they never learn to read for pure enjoyment?
— Did your parents ever use bribes or rewards with you? Do they still? Did they use sticker charts to encourage reading? Or cash to get you to clean your room? Did the bribes work? Did they backfire? What advice would you give your parents on how to motivate you to do what they think is best?
By Patrick Nardone
ReplyDeleteWe should not bribe our kids because then they will not respect us. Bribes do work sometimes but they are not the right thing to do. Bribing kids to eat and read do work but it is not right at certain times. We could bribe them to do certain things if it helps them in the future. If we teach our kids to be nice when they are little it will turn into a habit. Also if we teach our kids how to act when they are young they will be more respectful. If we bribe our kids they will not make it long in life. They will not know how to teach their kids to be nice. Also the “now parents” will need to get something out of it to do that thing they were being bribed for. Without the bribe they will not do what you were bribing them to do. My parents did not bribe me. If they did then I forgot because it was so long ago. It is not a good thing to bribe someone either. You need to teach them how to do things right and not bribe them. I would tell them to teach their kids at a young age. That will work most of the time. If they grow up with knowing what to do then they will do it. If we bribe our kids they will never learn right from wrong. Or even how to teach their own kids how to be nice. This is not a good way to teach our kids at all.
I agree with you patrick. I said similar things that you have said. I think bribing kids is a bad thing because then they won't learn the right lessons. Teaching them how to act shapes them to who they will become later.
DeleteI think bribing your kids isn't a good thing. If parents do it alot then the kid will expect things every time. Also they won't respect you as much. They will think they are getting tricked into doing something that they don't want to do. My dad once told me that he would only get me new shoes if I went to a couple stores with him and I didn't want to go, but I wanted new shoes so I did. Bribing is never a good thing to do to anyone because it's forcing them to do something they don't want to. Although if we teach them certain things early it will be good for when they get older. For example, if we teach them to be nice or show respect to everyone than when they are older it will just click in their heads that they were taught to do the right thing. Next if you bribe your kids then they won't learn anything. If you tell them to do something and they know they aren't going to like it, they won't do it. Personally I think bribing is pointless because it is basically like using somebody for things to do that they do not want to do. I won't bribe anybody to do anything because if they don't want to do something why should I force them to do it. Also I think bribing kids is a way to get them angry. I think the kids sometimes know that they are being tricked and they will just argue over everything to make you mad and to say that they do not have to do what you want them to do.
ReplyDeletePretty good response you got there Tyler. A little repetitive on some of the things you said but overall pretty good. I agree with you on where you said that it would make the kid not respect you as much. I feel that it would make the kid basically get what he wants from his parents as long as he does something. This would make the kid take advantage of the parent and like you said loose respect for their parent. Once again you are on the right track with this response good job my guy.
DeleteI do not think that parents should bribe their children with money, treats, clothes, or etc.. First off that is not gonna get them anywhere. When they get older they might not want to do what they have to unless someone bribes them. Like if they have a job and there boss tells them to do an extra assignment or even their normal assignment. The child might say well i will do the assignment if you give me a raise or if you let me leave work early the next day. Or anything in that type of field or maybe even say something worst. They will expect an offer for them to complete a responsibility. Also that's not the way you raise a kid. Make the child earn toys and money and treats and etc. Don't just hand it to them for doing something that they are already supposed to be doing. Doing the stuff you expect doesn't deserve a reward. I mean yea bribes are an effective way to get children to do what there parents want them to do but it's not the right way. If you really think about it bribes are an effective way to get anyone to do anything. Whether it be an adult or a child if you bribe someone with something they want or like they are more likely to do what you asked of them. The best way to encourage a certain behavior that becomes a habit in your child is to start young. Have them read books as they are very young and as they grow and work on hw and cleaning and start them off young with choirs and responsibilities and continue it until they're older age and it will stick with them through here lives. In my life my parents haven't really bribed me with rewards. I come from a strict family and i know what is expected of me. Have i always done the best of my ability and follow everything expected of me? No but i have learned and i get punished if i don't. Nothing in my house is just handed to me or bribed i have to earn it just like everyone else in my house has too.The advice i would give my parents on how to motivate me to do what they think is best is tough love. I tend to work better when tough love is applied because i know that it's for the best and i feed off of it.
ReplyDeleteBy Patrick Nardone
DeleteEli I totally agree with you. If you bribe someone it will not get them anywhere. They will not know how to teach their kids the right way to do anything. Also they will do nothing unless someone bribes them too. It is really just a loose losses situation.
Based off of the article, I think that bribery is the best way to encourage children to do things. I mean, let’s be honest, what else can you do to encourage them to do what they’re supposed to do? I remember one time, about two summers ago, I had a summer reading book. I did not want to read it at all. The book was 200 pages of pure torture. About two months into the summer, I still hadn’t touched it and my mom got furious. She agreed that if I finished the book before school started, she would take me out for dinner anywhere I wanted. So, I agreed, and I finished the book within two weeks after the bet. My mother was so impressed with me that she bribes me with everything that I would want, whether it would be video games, food, or other goodies. Bribery is the best way out of this kind of situation.
ReplyDeleteMy mom doesn’t just do this with me. She does this all the time with my sisters too, most of the time being sports and not homework. Both of my sisters play sports at the middle school. One plays volleyball and the other plays field hockey. My mom, to encourage them to try their hardest and win, rewards them after every win. Sometimes they’ll be taken to Dairy Queen for ice cream, or they will go out to dinner on the weekend. They’ll even get taken to a concert or Six Flags. I don’t think there is any other way to encourage children without bribing them.
Matt I agree with you, I think based off the article it really gets kids to do different things and experience many new things and teach them new stuff. I think what you said was good matt, I think if you keep doing bribing the kid would get to used to it and always expect something everytime. Good job matt
DeleteI think parents should not bribe their kids to do things. If you bribe them often they will only do things if you bribe them. They can also take advantage of it and ask for more than you usually give to do something. They take advantage of it because they know that you will only do things if you bribe them. Since they know that the kid can raise the things he or she is getting bribed with and they could add more on to that to make them do what you want them to do. Bribes are a very effective way to get kids to do what the parents want so they don’t have to go through all the arguing. It is not a good thing to bribe your kids but it gets the job done. I feel that the kid should only get bribed if the thing you need them to do is important at the time so they get it done. Other than that i don’t think it is a good idea to bribe your kids to do something. They should listen to what the parents say and do what is told to them but that’s not always the case so you can bribe them. I think bribes do end up teaching wrong lessons because for example if you bribe them to read they do it for what they are going to get not because they wanna learn from what comes from the book. I don’t get bribed to do things i need to do, i do what is told. In lots of cases the kid doesn’t want to do what is told so you bribe them.
ReplyDeleteHenry i agree, I think bribing is not the right way to do things. Also they will only do things if you bribe them. They should only get bribed if it is important and they need to do something. I think they end up teaching bad lessons and it makes kids accept things differently. I think you did a good job on this Henry and I agree with you.
DeleteI agree just because kids will take advantage of the bribes. It just doesn't lead you to anywhere. People need to do it themselves. No one needs to bribe them. Great job henry!
DeleteBribes are good and bad in my opinion. I think they are good because it get’s kids to try different things or either get certain things done and earn the bribe reward. I think they are also bad because some kids might abuse the privilege and do stuff for their parents just to get what they want which might cause kids to lose respect for their parents and not really appreciate them. I think parents should bribe their kids with their favorite foods or places to go not toys and money they already do enough for us kids. If kids get in the habit of just doing bribes and getting whatever they want they will start to ask for more and more causing the kids to take over the bribes and make the parents give them whatever they want for doing what they ask. My parents never really went down the bribe road cause my reward for helping them was food on the table, a roof over my head, warm water, clothes, and a bed to sleep in. So bribes never existed in my life and anything my parents ask me to do i just do to help them out. I am very glad my parents never bribed me with doing anything because it taught me a lot of more responsibilities and how to do things so that when i am older and on my own i will know how to do without earning anything in the end of it. I think bribing is a good and bad thing but it just comes down to how the parents were raised and how they raise their kids but at the end of the day we all deserve stuff here and there.
ReplyDeleteI agree with you 100%. Bribes can be a positive way to get your kids to try new things. Its a great way to show them new things that are out there. As long as the parent doesn't take it to far and make their kid think every time they try something they get to eat tacos and ice cream.
DeleteJoshua Rivera
ReplyDeleteParents try to bribe their kids for a lot of reasons. To get them to finish all of their vegetables, brush their teeth, to not eat junk food, to behave and tons of other things. Bribing I think can be good in some circumstances but there are definitely some bad things too. When a parent turns a bribe into a threat then I disagree. For example if a parent tells their kid to clean their room or they will be grounded for a week. That isn’t how a parent should go about something. They should something along the lines of “Can you clean your room before you go out”. If you show respect to your kid when asking them to do something they won’t resent doing the task and they would respect you more. Yes, parents are still obviously in charge of their children but, if you are fair and go about things the right way, you will have a much better relationship with your kids. Bribing can be a very good way to teach your kids a lesson or show them the importance of something. Just don’t make them think that they can get through life by bribing people and not working for what they have. Just remember that your kids are the future of this generation and the way you raise them will directly impact you in your old age and theirs. Be stern but fair, be in control but don’t treat them like you’re a dictator, and most importantly, show respect where you want to be respected, even when it comes to your kids.
We should not bribe your child it’s not good. You don't want a spoiled kid is a jock in high school. Kids should earn their things it should not be given or handed to them. They need to learn how to become a responsible human being and a healthy human being. If you start to bribe your children they will take advantage of you. They’ll do the things but they do shortcuts to things and they will never learn. They need to learn how to do things on their own. Bribes will hurt you in the long run. Just the fact your kid may be spoiled, not responsible, or organized. People need these traits to survive in the real world. Without them they would not last. They need to face adversity to be a good adult. If you bribe your kids to read they won’t enjoy it as much just because you’re forcing them basically. They won’t understand the theme of the book.
ReplyDeleteYes my parents use bribes but it’s not like a bribe it’s just for me to be more of an organized person. The bribes have kind of worked because I keep my room clean sometimes. I think bribes are not good because I take shortcuts sometimes. You don’t want to do that it’s not a good trait. That my parents should push me more and remind me. I like being tested and challenges that I can do. I hate when people doubt. I think it would help me in life more to be a organized person and human being.